Finding God's Will

I have been on a sabbatical of sorts for the past three months. My former church, Faith United Presbyterian Church, was kind enough to extend my salary for three months after I left. I am forever grateful for their kindness expressed for my ten years of service there.

These past three months have had a refreshing effect on me. Aside from teaching my Luke-Acts course at Azusa Pacific, I have not done much. I have gotten my resume together, and filled out the necessary paperwork for my denomination, a PIF for those in the know. I have read some, prayed some, written some, watched some movies, taken a trip to Austin with my wife. Mostly, I have enjoyed just being. Still, the question begs an answer: "what's next?"

Soon after leaving FUPC, we began attending Arcadia Presbyterian Church. We liked it right away. I had done some college ministry there as an intern from 1986 to 1988. After a few worship services, I met with their pastor, Jim Conner, a few times. I discovered that the church was looking for a temporary pastoral assistant. I was very tempted by this position, and yet, when it turned out to only be part time, I decided against it. Initially, a temporary position was all I was capable of envisioning. But the combination of rest, and spiritual refreshment from APC's worship have helped me look longer into the future. So I wound up putting my application in for their Associate Pastor position. Tomorrow, I will interview with the Associate Pastor Nominating Committee.

During this seeking process, I met with John D'Elia, a regional VP for the Presbyterian Foundation. I had known John at Fuller, back in the day, and it was good to catch up with him. As it turns out, he needs a Development Officer for the San Fernando/San Gabriel/Pacific Presbyteries. I was recommended to him. He had seen my work at the San Gabriel Presbytery, and liked the way I presented things to the Presbytery at meetings. This was totally out of the blue. I was so stunned to hear that he was interested in seeing me apply, I laughed all the way home after our lunch together.

But I started reflecting on my last seven years. I was chosen to serve on our Presbytery's Administration and Finance Committee, and served for two years as its moderator. I became acutely aware of both the administrative and financial issues as a pastor at Faith United. And so, a life long interest in finance has led me to a place where I could use some of those gifts and interests. But, I thought, I'm a pastor! How can I do this?
And so, right now, I am between two positions. Associate Pastor, or Development Officer. Both positions intrigue me.

Last Friday, I met with John Turner, the Foundation's DO for Orange, Riverside and San Diego Presbyteries. He told me of a sermon he heard on determining God's will. Three questions.

1. Is it righteous? By this, I take it to mean, is it in line with Kingdom values and ideals? Does it support the work of Christ? Both positions offer this. The Associate Pastor position is more direct, the DO is more indirect. But both support the church and its ministries.
2. Is it something you can do? I have been a pastor, and I know how that works. I acknowledge that there is much for me to learn. There is much to learn to be a DO. There are certifications to earn, terms to learn, procedures to get up to speed on, people to get to know. But it seems to me to be a very relational job, and that's me. (Most of the time!) It appears that the PTB's at the Foundation would prefer a person with Development or Fund-Raising experience. I have very little of that experience, and they would be taking a risk with me. But I have always felt it better to take someone who has some core gifts and passions, and train them, let them learn the tools of the trade, than hiring someone who is already set in a certain way of doing things.
3. What do others say? I have talked with many people about these matters. Most have said they could see me do both, as long as my heart was in it. A few have said that they would hate to see the church lose me as a pastor. And yet, I countered, I would be doing pastoral work in a way. And nothing in the DO position precludes me from local church ministry, though on a more limited basis. No one has said that I should not do the pastoral position.

So, here I am, "stuck" between both options. Reading Os Guiness' book, "The Call" has helped. Prayer has helped. Writing in my journal has helped. Conversations with my wife and kids have helped.

I am grateful for these opportunities. I am, of course, open to the possibility that neither of these positions are the right ones for me. But I want to serve. I want to make my life count, and exercise my gifts. The questions remain: Where and in what capacity?

Time will tell. I would appreciate your prayers.